"That's a fine looking turkey, thank you", promptly wring its neck, and send it to the kitchen to be cooked.
Presidents since JFK, Reagan too, have been 'freeing' the turkey, and since Bush 41, officially pardoning the damn bird... just... WTH?!
Pardon me, but stuff your pardons, eat the damn bird, and give thanks for the opportunity to do so!
Turkeys.
Sheesh.
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Fools will be suffered and battered with glee,
Trolls will be fed and booted for free,
at least until they become more boring than fun,
or if they peg my disgust-o-meter,
at which point they'll be deleted,
unsung.